It does not matter who broke up with who, the question you must ask yourself is, “Should I really go hang out with my ex?” Do you still care about your ex? Can you keep your hands off him? There are a lot of rules involved in this type of situation. You must decide what you should and should not do in this situation. If you are not sure, here are some pointers to help you.
1. Set the Rules
Make sure you and your ex are on the same page when it comes to hanging out. You need to set your ground rules before the day arrives; this ensures you are both comfortable with what is or is not going to happen, and what the purpose of this “session” is.
2. Do Not Have Expectations
Just because your ex asked you to hang out does not mean he wants to get back together. If you guys were really good friends before you started dating it is quite possible he just wants to have a good time.
3. Do Not Talk About Your Relationship
Hanging out means having fun. If you bring up your relationship it may lead to hurt feelings. Chances are you argued at some point during the breakup, or at some point leading up to the end. Why ruin a good time by rehashing bad memories? If he wanted to talk to you about getting back together, he would have said this.
4. Do Not Discuss Your Social Life
Let’s get real. Both of you have probably gone on dates since ending your relationship. This does not mean you do not still care about one another–this can take months. If you talk about your current social life the green-eyed monster can rise from the depths of within and ruin a good evening.
5. Do Not Get Drunk
This is he biggest mistake you can make. Alcohol makes it too easy to throw all caution to the wind, wrap your arms around him and run–not walk–back to his place. If he did not intend to become serious again, and you sleep with him, you can become emotionally scarred for months.
6. Keep Your Feelings In Check
The minute you look into his eyes you may want to tell him how much you love him and want him back. He may feel the same. This is not a good idea. Remain emotionally stable and just enjoy one another. This is quite possibly the first step to something more, but moving too fast can ruin it all.
7. No Kissing Allowed
As the night ends, no matter how much you may want to kiss him goodbye, end it with a smile. This lets him know you enjoyed yourself and is enough to let him know you would enjoy another evening with him. Let him contemplate it; if you shared enough laughs chances are your phone wil ring again.
Your ex is an ex for a reason. This does not mean a second chance is not in the books for you, but you need to take it slow. Simply hanging out and building a friendship is a great way to start.